I got a bit of bad news today. This morning I was diagnosed with Lupus, which is a pretty scary thing (it has to be, if it's named after a wolf). Now I'm trying to stay positive, but in times of trouble it's nice to have friends you can lean on (like the song!), so I thought I'd maybe lean on y'all. I went ahead and converted, to eight different religions, just so I'm covered. And if any of you want to send thoughts, prayers, or well-wishes my way, that'd be pretty great too. Also, if you wanted to take up a collection in my name, it would be much appreciated, because my job as head sanitation worker and chief kitten rescuer doesn't include health insurance (damn you President Obama!). I figured that you can just send it to Witchy, and she can forward it on to me (she has my address from the Reaper Claus exchange). I was also hoping that our Texas pals Corvus, Spooky, OctoberChill, and Castle might get their guns ready, in case things get too painful and I need to be put down in a hurry. Ciuin, I'm counting on you to put in a good with the Kennedys, see if they'd want to get involved, raise the profile on the issue and all. Mike, if you could hook me up with a slice of Chicago deep-dish pizza, or even just a really artfully taken photo of one, that would be awesome. Midnite, maybe you could help Mike with the cheese on the pizza. To our Canadian friends, xtina666, Ms. Monster, and Pumpkin King, do you think you could line up Bryan Adams and Michael J. Fox to do a telethon/benefit concert? I'm sure Shanda, Shadow of the 31st, DemonSlayerMau, and Nostalgiascape would be willing to answer phones. Ghoul of the Graves, if you're still around and still in Britain, save a spot for me in line at your free nationalized health clinic, cause I'm flying over. SpookyBlackKat, a glass of OJ would be spot on! iHaunt, I'd love a few garlic breads. If ilovemichaelmyers is still around, I would love to see Sharon Angle lose before I die. And Rising Dead Man, if you still have those ear flaps you cut off your Ed Gein hat, my ears are a bit chilly. And Andy, old friend... Old, old, old,
old friend.... Please change your diaper before my funeral.
Thanks in advance for all your support. I guess if there's any good news in all of this, it would be that it was a self-diagnosis, and, as I'm not actually a doctor, or even passingly familiar with medicine, I've been able this evening to upgrade my condition from "Lupus" to "the common cold", which carries with it a much better prognosis. But you, uh.... You can still send me all that stuff I mentioned. Since you've already gone to all the trouble...
